camp bisco was so beautiful. it’s hard to be home. at least i’m with my cat, who i brought & taped a picture of into my tent. i got to see 32 different artists & danced my ass off. the weather was literally perfect. and once again i was surprised at just how in love with brett i can get, how he keeps impressing me is beyond me. he’s just the coolest boy i’ve ever met. i’m so lucky.
yesterday i took the day off life. i woke up & went right to wonderland. i danced around my apartment in my silk jammies, listened to my headphones & watched independence day while eating cereal from a box. yesterday i didnt even kind of feel like a grown up. it was a good day.
i used to cry everyday because i was just that god damn happy. && now i cry everyday cause i’m just so sad.
this time last year everything was so different. my life was still normal & perfect. i’m so tired of being sick everyday. i just want my life back. brett and my mom are the only people who even kind of get what i’m going through. i can’t drink anymore. i keep trying, it just doesn’t happen. so now in my mid 20s i’m now no longer able to drink with my friends. i’m bordering on full blown depression. all i do anymore is cry and sleep. i’ve had maybe half a dozen good days in the past six months.
and i miss my little brother. things were so much simpler last year.
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